One Step Forward

I mentioned way back aways about how sometimes I, as a spoonie, have to get out of my head. Yesterday was one of those days. I've been blessed with some good days physically and I have been very careful not to overdo it. Of course I look longingly at the weeds around the patio, the clutter here and there that I am slowing getting to, and on and on.

My dinner plans fell through, I was hungry and had that squiggle of frustration over my head like in cartoons. I was just in that place. Things have been working themselves out lately and I'm so grateful for a small break from all the stress. I needed a breath of fresh air. That's what I got all right.

Let's just say the best laid plans...wait-is that it? The saying? At any rate, I went to take myself out to eat and see a movie. I ended up not doing that but having great fun, doing nothing that would hurt me (well, in addition to the regular pain) but that did give me a slight hangover. I needed to laugh like that, to enjoy myself without my usual worrying-are the chairs going to be comfortable, the food, will I need a sweater. I didn't get tired, I didn't go to excess (welllll....maybe) and I am paying for it now. I slept so well. My head feels clear. I feel...clearer.

It's not something I would try to replicate. I know it was a happenchance type of thing. Am I hurting? Hell yeah. Am I smiling through the pain? I'm smiling despite it.